Monday, May 4

*snap*

tomorrow is my one and only final and i just cannot get my act together. i always thought i had senioritis every other semester of college when the last third of the semester rolled around, but i realize now that senioritis as an actual senior is far worse than any other feeling resembling senioritis during any other year could possibly be. at this exact moment i wouldn't even care if i failed my test, even though deep down i do care and that has been the only thing that has made me study the 3 hours i have, rather than the many more that i should have. looks like an early morning for me.

also, last night i had a very depressing realization that i only have one of each weekday left to enjoy before i leave. this was my last sunday in chattanooga at new city fellowship. i rather enjoyed the music with michael, david and mary singing along with james ward however. they are about my most favorite worship team. michelle gave her ever impressive announcements, also, which made me feel very happy. and randy nabors was his reliable self, preaching with many hilarious side comments to make the sermon relatable. all in all, it was a very good last week at new city. i will definitely miss it.

i am not looking forward to the evening hours of may 9th that are quickly approaching. i will not be in either of my own beds, as i will have recently departed the one in my dorm and will not quite have made it home to my big ol' comfy bed at home, and will be without my friend to be cozy at night with and have morning coffee with.

i am going to miss so many things about being here that i'm not really wanting to think about the future, trying to focus on exciting summer/fall plans rather than the inevitable take-off time that always rolls around. every year i have looked forward to it with increasing anticipation, booking it out of carter circle as soon as the car was packed to it's limit. i've always left within about 12 hours of my last final, not wanting to spend more time at covenant than necessary. as it is always prone to happen, the last year is the best, making me not want to leave at all, let alone immediately.

on the flip-side...
things i AM excited about for summer:
  • perhaps restarting my summer bible study tradition with my high school friends
  • babysitting a precious little goddard child when i'm in need of baby fixes
  • an income
  • sunshine
  • wildflowers
  • campustown SB
  • becoming a regular at leaves n' beans (their viennese roast is to die for)
  • craft projects
  • getting daily emails from india
  • hearing all the goings on and preparations of my friends who still have to go back to school and realizing i can just visit now on my own time
  • straightening out the rules of adulthood: taxes, insurance, student loan repayment, rent, etc.
  • making a plan for fall
  • having a car with a rearview mirror to hang my first OFFICIAL graduation tassle on
  • feeling the sense of accomplishment when i realize that i'm DONE with my undergrad, even tho the next phase is hazy
  • thinking about grad school
  • reading ALOT
  • spending less money, learning to budget, etc.
  • reconnecting
  • loving from a distance for a new flavor and phase of a friendship (i really think all good friendships should go through this phase)
  • trusting in the LORD
so that's my little list that i can come up with right now. i probably should look over my study materials one more time before bed so that i can wake up early to hopefully pack it into my little tired brain for one last go around. come lunch tomorrow, however, i'll be done with college!

*sigh* ohh the relief.

6 comments:

Taryn Lamp said...

New city was particularly amazing. I good songs, good sermon, good michelle. i will miss swaying and singing at the top of my lungs with a huge grin on my face. Any sort of motion during worship is out of the ordinary at westminister. so i relished every sway and clap.
I want to photograph every day every event, so i can remember them forever. Last week. It snuck up on us so fast. i've been waiting for these days in the sense that we can just do nothing and everything that we want to do, but it means that the end is upon us. that is terribly sad. I am dreading the moment we have to part.

It is typical that our last year here has been the best. A shame we didnt meet sooner.
i'm glad you have things to look forward to. I need to make a list like that. All i see are the much needed plans that need to be made. for india. for life. I hope i have some time to relax before all that. Its the last really free period of our lives. weird. being done with it all is weird. freeing. but scary. We definitely have an adventure ahead of us. Thanks for being my partner in crime. i'm glad we have these few days to be together and do nothing.

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