that is how i feel right now. kind of an empty-pensive-comfy-confused-comforted sort of feeling...
does that make sense?
right now i am sitting in my very warm, cozy room. i am knitting a little tiny blanket for a person who hasn't been born, hasn't been named, but i love him already.
i am watching a movie that is very indie, very emo, very musical, very wistful.
i am longing for a hand to hold, a soul to hug, a friend who thinks like me and loves like me and appreciates like me...to appreciate this moment.
i am contemplating the vast difference of my life between august and december.
i am missing the piano, missing the joy of making music, missing art, missing creating.
i am missing the idealistic world that i often describe my childhood as, that you see in movies, where it never gets dark, you just run through life barefoot, loving every little color, every little smell, every sight, taste, and feeling, every sound. hearing the harmonies of nature.
i can't live in an idealistic world alone.
i need you.